Sleep update

As you may or may not know, Luke isn't the best sleeper in the world. I laugh when I read stuff in parenting magazine like, "Most babies should be sleeping through the night by 6 months old." The past few months have been a struggle, and a couple of weeks ago I was at a breaking point. I got my hands on a few books (mostly no-cry, minimal cry philosophy-type books) and devoured them (again). We really made an effort to be home and starting Luke's routine by 6:30 pm every night, following his cues. On a side note, it's really hard as a parent of two children to be really consistent about routines for the younger child. Beth stays up till 8 these days (sometimes later, if we're out) and Ryan and I like to do stuff in the evening with her now that she's older. But...Luke needs to go to sleep by 7:00 pm, his cues are obvious and if we keep him up later then the whole night is ruined. Ryan and I are big time believers in routine and consistency, and we believe Beth has really thrived because of that, so we want to follow Luke's cues and get him to bed when he's ready. So we've been doing his routine and I firmly believe it's helped him fall asleep faster. The big issue has been getting him to stay asleep.

One night I let him cry for a little bit, I told myself I'd give him 10 minutes then go to him. By minute 5 or 6, he made hardly any whimpering noises, and the last noise I heard from him was around minute 9. He slept solidly until 3:15! Usually I'd bring him to bed with us, but I went to his room, nursed him and put him back in bed and he feel back asleep with no problem. He woke up at 6:00! I thought we were onto something, so we've been doing it that way since then. This means I'm up for about 15 minutes a night, in his room, but it also means he's not in my bed screaming and kicking me. It had gotten to the point where he just wouldn't go back to sleep easily when he was in our bed, so as much as I love cuddling with sweet babies, I've realized Luke sleeps better in his own bed. Plus he wasn't being too sweet- seriously, he's a kicker. Ryan and I are sleeping a little better, and not all nights go as smoothly as that first night, but I feel like overall it's an improvement.

Before Beth was born, I told myself I'd never let my kids "cry it out" in their beds. I didn't know what it was like to be so sleep deprived that you literally fell asleep within seconds of rocking a baby for naptime. I don't consider 10 minutes of crying to be too rough, only because I know that he will calm down now. Beth used to escalate if I let her cry in her crib, but Luke seems to be the opposite now. I'm happy that we seem to have found something that works for now, even though I'm still not sleeping through the night and even though I realize we'll probably have to change something else before he finally sleeps through the night. But I don't want to be ashamed either- I know there are groups of people who think any amount of crying is child abuse, and other groups who would plop their babies in bed and not open the door again till 7 am. I'd like to think I'm not on either end of that spectrum, but instead found something that works right now for us.